Dark humor ahead-
For familyradio.com listeners , the world ends at 6PM May 21, 2011 in an apocalyptic earthquake. Most other prophecies indicate that the world ends on December 21, 2012. Just in case the real apocalypse will commence in 72 hours instead of 582 days, Judicial Council Watcher brings you this handy judicial branch pocket guide to the end of the world.
1. Good news! Most of the legal profession is predicted survive the rapture.
2. Nothing matters anymore. Were you afraid to take that kickback? Afraid to write yourself a million dollar check on the company account? Afraid to toss the litigant you don’t like under the bus? Afraid to tell that judge you never liked to stick it where the sun doesn’t shine? Afraid to knock over a bank? Afraid to siphon off your clients funds? Did you ever contemplate how you just might be able to get away with murder? Afraid to grope that hot administrative assistant in front of her coworkers? If you believe the world is going to end in 72 hours you can do whatever the hell you want because it doesn’t matter anymore. Who is going to hold you accountable? Who is going to be around to sue, arrest or imprison you?
3. The more people who believe that the world will end in 72 hours is directly proportional to the ensuing anarchy resulting therein. Batten down the hatches and load up the assault rifle. If you live in California kiss your ass goodbye because while wristrockets, the bow and arrow and crossbows are still legal and it will be the criminals that know where you live that will have the assault rifles.
4. Promise away to your hearts content. It isn’t your fault the world ended before you could fulfill your promise.
5. You have an obligation to your profession to survive the calamity following rapture. Stock up on food, water, emergency supplies and enough oxygen to last for 5 years. While scientific evidence shows that the globe has been engulfed in a terraforming global fireball six times in its history, life survived to rebuild each time.
Any other suggestions to JCW’s pocket guide to the apocalypse are welcome and encouraged.
________________________________________________________
NEW – “Jackpot” by Bill Girdner of Courthouse News
wendy darling
May 18, 2011
Published today, Wednesday, May 18, 2011, from the Metropolitan News Enterprise:
CJA President, Judge Herman Say Differences Have Been Resolved, By a MetNews Staff Writer. http://www.metnews.com/
Long live the ACJ.
Judicial Council Watcher
May 18, 2011
Either later today or early tomorrow JCW will be covering some proposed amendments to the text of AB1208 that turn it from the Judiciary committees version of “it’s not nice to take trust funds from the trial courts” to something more akin to “These are trial court funds that belong to the trial courts”
Assemblymember Calderon is holding the line and needs your continued support.
wendy darling
May 18, 2011
And he has it.
Long live the ACJ.
Mrs. Kramer
May 19, 2011
5.18.11 AB 1208 AMENDED Available Online
http://www.leginfo.ca.gov/pub/11-12/bill/asm/ab_1201-1250/ab_1208_bill_20110518_amended_asm_v97.html
Judicial Council Watcher
May 21, 2011
Countdown 11 hours and 2o minutes until 89 year old Harold Camping’s end of the world. He’s made the prediction before but miscalculated. What are JCW’s plans for JCW’s last half day on earth? About the same as any other day except tonight we’re eating dinner at 5PM instead of 7PM and we’re calling it Harold’s last supper. Having spent over a million dollars on billboards nationwide to mark this fateful day, we can’t help but wonder how many individuals were convinced to give up all of their worldly possessions to get the message out and how many attorneys will be lined up come Monday morning trying to recover those assets.
Judicial Council Watcher
May 21, 2011
1900 hrs PST – http://earthquake.usgs.gov/earthquakes/recenteqsww/
Imagine that! We’re still here!
This is the only California earthquake registered for the day.
Magnitude 3.6
Saturday, May 21, 2011 at 07:04:56 PM at epicenter
Location 37.981°N, 122.249°W
Depth 9.6 km (6.0 miles)
Region SAN FRANCISCO BAY AREA, CALIFORNIA
Distances 3 km (2 miles) SSE (164°) from Hercules, CA
4 km (3 miles) ENE (71°) from El Sobrante, CA
4 km (3 miles) ESE (116°) from Pinole, CA
12 km (8 miles) N (10°) from Berkeley, CA
21 km (13 miles) N (355°) from Oakland, CA
Location Uncertainty horizontal +/- 0.2 km (0.1 miles); depth +/- 0.4 km (0.2 miles)
Parameters Nph= 94, Dmin=3 km, Rmss=0.19 sec, Gp= 43°,
M-type=local magnitude (ML), Version=2
JusticeCalifornia
May 23, 2011
The world is still here, but let’s hope it is changing.
In Marin County, we have had two law enforcement lawyers appointed by our governors to key positions (Board of Supervisors, and the Marin bench) in the past SIX MONTHS.
http://www.sfgate.com/cgi-bin/article.cgi?f=/c/a/2011/05/22/BAO31JJJT2.DTL
http://articles.sfgate.com/2010-12-05/bay-area/25008406_1_governor-names-public-defender-new-judges